The Great Adventures of a Wallflower.

• Wrote up a resume
• Bought graduation presents
• Emailed my volunteer department to set up my summer schedule
• Started to look for a roommate for next year
• Unpacked my suitcase
• Uploaded vacation pictures
• Resumed my annual Netflix lyfe
• Started looking for a job on campus

This is an impressive list considering the fact that all I really have the motivation to do is lay in bed watching Netflix, and taking the occasional nap. I was exhausted during my whole entire vacation, which, if I’m not mistaken, should be the opposite of how I should have felt. Actually, I’ve been exhausted since finals ended. I’m pretty sure a piece of me died the day I had to take my calc II, chem, and French final all on one day starting from 8 am, and ending at 10 pm with an 8 am final the next day. IT’S A LOT OF THINKING WITH VERY LITTLE SLEEP. I’M STILL RECOVERING. *End complaints*

Did I just bond with a cool guy over some cool music?
Dreams do come true.

I’ll never tell you what I saw
Or how it made me breathe.
I’ll never repeat what I heard
How long it took me to leave.
I’ll never tell you what I saw
Or how it made my smile freeze
Cause this world is a whirlwind, but I’m holding that trapeze
And I’ll never tell you what I saw

I’ll never tell you who I loved
Or how they made me free
I’ll never tell you how I slept
Back when I was 15
I thought that I could just forget
The bricks that have built me
But this world is a whirlwind and I’m holding that trapeze
And I’ll never tell you who I loved

But if I could tell you one thing
I would tell you I’m not leaving
If I could show you one thing
All my mistakes have shaped me
Into who I am
And who I am just wants to make you home

I’ll never tell you why I drive
Into the night and back again
I hardly speak of my hometown
My little hands in the cement
I’ll never tell you what I saw, close the door, swallow the key 
But this world is a whirlwind and I’m holding that trapeze
Ya this world keeps on turning, love is carried in a sling
Ya this world is a whirlwind and I’m holding that trapeze.
So I’ll never tell you what I saw

Dia Frampton

Hahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahah
ahahahahahhahahahahahahah
hahahhahahahahahhahaha
hahhahahahhahaha
hhahahahahahh
ahahahahh
ahahah
haha
What.

I wish somebody had told me that it’s okay to mess up. So now, I’m here to tell you that it’s okay to make mistakes. It doesn’t mean that we suck, it doesn’t mean that we’re worthless, or stupid, or dumb. It just means that we’re human. If we could all be perfect, what would be the point of life? I know it’s hard to accept that failure is something that is inevitable in one form or another, but it’s true. Nobody is perfect. And messing up doesn’t have to mean finding yourself at the very bottom, it can simply be that you’re disappointed in yourself in even the smallest, most miniscule way that doesn’t mean much to anybody else, but has crushed your world. But trust me, you’ll be okay. 

… It’s okay as long as you’ve tried your damned hardest, you pick yourself up, you recognize the fact that you don’t want to be where you are, and you try, try again. What more can you do?

Yes, you can beat yourself up about it, you can cry about it, and you can mope about it. You can do all of that, and it’s okay to do that in the beginning, but at some point, you have to stop blaming yourself. Don’t let the guilt eat you up. Believing that everything will be okay despite all of this is only way you can get past anything that has ever discouraged or disappointed you. 

You may be scared shitless, you may be reconsidering your whole entire life, and you might feel like you’re not good enough for anything anymore, but that’s not true. The fact that you tried and you’re disappointed in yourself is proof enough that you know you’re worth it, and you know you’re capable of doing great things. So, focus on that.

It’s okay to make mistakes. 
And if you pick yourself up, in the end, you’ll be okay.